DAY 5- the story of love

Today, I met an extraordinary woman. A woman soon to be a widow, whose story of love and endurance really touched me. It made me want to forget about being a nurse for a while, and just run away to cry. On her behalf.

I work in a hotel. It´s a patienthotel close to a big hospital in norway, and I work there as nurse-reseptionist. It´s a rewarding job, most days. I get to see my patients, but not having to get too involved. I get to talk to them, get to listen to their stories, and then I get to walk them to their rooms, where they tend to stay. Most of them. And I get to see newborn babies everyday too.
It´s a good job, most days.
I don´t have to put in iv fluids or to handle medicin in any way. I don´t have to bath people, help them change their wound dressings or be there when people have to face their biggest fears. I get to be there afterwards though. Get to listen when there is nothing left to say. I get to comfort and give hugs.
I get to be human.

So I met this woman.
This extraordinary woman. Her husband through 30 somewhat years is dying in the hopsital. And there´s nothing that she or anyone can do about it. All the things that could have been said is allready said, all that could have been done is done. And she knows it.
She´s a smart lady. All that is left is grieving. And allthough you can tell from her whole appearance that she is allready so eathen up by grief, she´s struggeling so hard not to be. See, she is not alloved to grief just yet, because her husband is still alive. So she talkes so me. About him, how he acted when he first found out about the canser, how he had hope, and how that hope slowly went away with the canser spreading. How she cared for him at home as long as she could, seing him being reduced to a child again, and how she would let him need her in all ways. She tells me how happy she is that she was able to at least give him that. That she could be there, tend to his every need.
I tell her that she is brave. I tell her that he is so lucky to have her. To have her love.
And she sais that is´t good to talk. Good that I listen. She sais there´s just not enough listeners out there. This is a smart woman with a great big heart.And I´m so sorry to see it break. I´m so sorry that she has to go through this hell. Can´t imagine how scared and hurt she really is, I can just see the bits and pieces that she allows me to see when in need of a friendly face.

Stories of love comes in so many different wrappings. It takes the toughest kind to be there with your heart and soul when your true love through 30 somewhat years is dying. It takes the toughest kind to endure the pain of loosing someone dear, piece by piece, when there´s nothing you can do. Extraordinary love.

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