DAY 30: Closework(ing) it down memorylane

I cant believe it´s been 6 years.... where did the time go? And why was it in such a rush?

I know I´m not the first one uttering words about time passing too fast. Still, I´m sitting here, thinking, what? What happened? What happened to those years? In some strange way it doesn´t feel like six years though, it feels like yesterday. Feels like no time passed since Kristoffer Metcalfe looked at me and said - Do you like it? I had tears in my eyes, watching Hivju play the role of the caring nurse while the patient, Espen Høyner (who in real life is not at all disabled) spit in his face. For some reason, sitting behind the cameras felt so natural to me, taking in the whole essense of the set, the actors working infront of the camera, and good old Chris directing. It felt like I was in my right element, being there, rubbing cold hands, and bringing coffee. Now, it´s no secret. I know I didn´t -at all(!) have anything to do about the way the whole movie turned out, but still. Being in that creative environment made me feel... Alive! Being around such creative souls made me feel like I could some how tap into their thoughts and feed on them, like a vulture. Not like an evil vulture though. Being around creativity breeds creativity, and for me, I just enjoyed picking their brains, taking it all in and storing it for later.
How I miss it. Never a dull day.  -Thinking back, It seams like boring days didn´t exist in the past. Always smiling, never alone. Drama, music and friends all over. And maybe it wasn´t like that. Maybe I´m just making it up to be that way in my head. That time has in it´s mysterious ways erased whatever bad memories there was. And I guess I that´s great. That time has the power to that. To make us remember the good, and forget about the bad. Still, six years, where did they go. What did I do? And where did I loose that sense of immortal youth and cheerful merriment?
Wherever it went, I´m aware now, and it´s all because of this little piece of art. Strange how a picture or a song or movie can take you back, ha? Make you remeber how you felt in that exact moment of time. 
I´m glad I remember, though my memories are dazzled with just a little hint of bittersweet. Because somewhere along the busyness of living those six years I lost a part of myself. I lost my careless youth. And it´s not that I want it back either . I´m perfectly happy where I am. A responsible grown-up, in love, with a great home and a stable income.
Still. Taking this trip down memorylane has made me aware of what I lost, and given me another one of lives great lessons. Drop the carelessness, keep the youth. Be strong and vital. Be creative! Make life happen! 
I´m gonna do just that now! Live by those words. And I´m gonna give Kris a call, to see if maybe, just maybe, there would be a chance that I could work for him again! Thanks for posting this on youtube, Kris, I had totally forgotten about it.

1 comment:

  1. haha! Du får kolla in Kris sin nye film Amors baller (eller hva den nå hette) som har preimære p kino nå i mars =)


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