day 137: fighting fear - in the air

It´s not easy combining fear of flying with wanting to explore the world. Still, that´s what thousands of people do every single day. They fly scared or they chose to not fly at all. I´m  a scared flyer, but instead of continuing to make up excuses for why not to see the world, I will fight off my fear.  I will do it now and I will make it happen. I will no longer be afraid

Googeling "fear of flying" gives about ten million hits. So does also the phrase " fright of flying" or "scared of flying". That makes me realize two things. I´m not the only one feeling afraid- and(..) there´s help to be found for how to overcome this irrational fear. 
Flying truly is the best, quickest and safest way to get around the world. And although every scared flyer knows this, me included, I really feel that I´m about to die every time I set out to the airport. Days before I´m even supposed to go I start to create silly obsessive thoughts like " if four cars pass us before we hit that lane- then the plane will crash", "is that explosion on television an omen, will it happen to us?" and "tree times xxx, that´s gotta be a sign for ....something, right?... come on..." Writing about it now it feels silly, but the truth is I wash´t even able to write about my fear just a few days ago, prior to my latest flight. Again with the obsessive thoughts, like if even writing about my fear would trigger it. Like if writing about it would in some strange way jinx the whole safety of the ride. Don´t get it? Think I´m crazy? Well, here´s a little task for you. Just to make you realize  how irrational your thoughts can actually get. 

1: find a clean piece of paper and a working pen
2: close your eyes- think hard about the one person you love the most and visualize this persons face and smile. Open your eyes while still thinking about this person
3: write down the name of this person on your piece of paper, then write : (colon)
4: after the colon: write  : dies in a accident tomorrow at ten o clock

Freaky right? Can´t do it? Well, you´re not alone. This test was done to a whole bunch of psychologists at the institution I used to work as a nurse; as a pointer for never to forget that anxiety lives in every one of us. Many of the oh-so-well-educated-psykologists could´t go through with test, actually, most people can´t do this. And it doesn´t mean that the´re crazy or anything. It´s just goes to show how the mind works. it´s just a proof of how irrasional our minds can get when triggered. We all know that none of us actually beholds the power to change the future with our minds, or pens (...) but still we don´t want to... jinx it. Simple as that. I know that my fear of flying is just as irrational as your fear of wanting to write down a name on that piece of paper. Fear is not about getting it together. Fear has nothing to do with being strong, or having a strong mind. Fear is sometimes both rational and necessary to survive. And fear can be irrational and de-powering. Being afraid is a horrible feeling, weather it´s a justified fear or not.

For years I used to fly without fright. I used to love the feeling of lift-off. Turbulence always made me calm and I never listened for scary sounds. I just trusted that everything would be ok, that I would get from A to B without any bigger events than me getting my food and drinks served. I wasn´t afraid, I was never afraid. I used to fly alone over the atlantic, no fear. I sometimes even flew Aeroflot, even knowing that statistically their planes are not considered to be the safest choice. But hey(!)  it was cheap and I could smoke at the time- while flying. I loved it. It never even accord to me that the plane could suddenly fall from the skies, that there could be explotions in the motors, that a wing could suddenly break or (...)anything like that.  It never ever occurred to me that I would´t get where I was going. I felt totally safe. Until it one day over the atlantic just simply changed. No big scary events or anything. It just hit me- the plane could actually fall down. And with that thought came fear. I was afraid, and all of a sudden, my once heartfelt feeling of safety was gone. Just like that, in a minute or so.
I want it back- my feeling of being safe. And I will work for it, read about planes, work with my mind. Meditate. I will stay true to my project and make it happen. I stated when I first started writing this blog that it would be all about living life fully. But how can I really if fear is holding me back? No more fear. I don´t want it anymore. Now, that was the easy part, deciding to take it on- my fear, now it really begins. I ordered, for the fist time in years, plane tickets (!) to go to London- with my man! And I´m excited- both about the trip, and about fighting off fear. I will do it- got about two months before my next planetrip- and I plan to fly fearless. Ready to join? Here we go!

Ok, I´ve got two months. And an endless line of reading material- right here on my laptop. I will go out to the airport closest to my house and just stand there for a bit. I will read up on planes and what´s to be expected during flight. I will write and share, and maybe even get in touch with a norwegian woman magazine or something, to check out if they want to use me as a bunny for one of those flight-fight-of-fear--classes that air companies do.We´ll see, there´s many, many possibilities. Let the work begin! I´m ready!

And people- please do share your experiences with me if you are, or have been scared as well! Please- all help is good help. if you did indeed overcome fear of flying, what helped you? Together we can help many:) with love- r

1 comment:

  1. Great approach to dealing with a fear of flying.. really enjoyed the blog!



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